Dear Allergic Co-Worker,

I find it strange that you didn't publicize more heavily your allergy to nuts. Seriously, how would any of us know that you even had one? Yes, I saw your MedicAlert bracelet, but I didn't think it was really my business to pry. So I didn't ask about it. Of course, when you collapsed in the break room, I read the bracelet thoroughly before taking any action. I had no idea what kind of stuff is on those things, so I had to be cautious. Sure, I saw then that you have a nut allergy. It was a little too late at that point, don't you think? You never told us you have Epilepsy, either. I didn't know Epileptic people could get jobs. That's cool.

I hope you don't think I was laughing at you when you couldn't breathe. That isn't what happened at all. Right before we came in, Aaron Barttleson had been doing his impression of this monkey he saw at the zoo last weekend. The monkey got super angry because he was trying to use a stick to get a piece of food from the ledge, but he couldn't. It was sooo funny; you'll have to see it when you get out of the hospital. Anyway, I was laughing at that, and then I saw you on the floor. I didn't know it was you at first since your face was so swollen and you weren't talking. That's why I didn't rush right into giving you mouth-to-mouth. Obviously I would have if I'd known it was you, but it might have been a total stranger. It probably wouldn't have done much good anyway, because, as Jeremy was saying later, your throat was shut up tighter than a submarine. I thought that was pretty funny too. That's probably about what it was like, huh?

Just so you know, this whole thing is not really my fault. It's Aaron's fault. He knocked the can of cocktail nuts out of my hand; that's how it spilled into the drawer of utensils. I have to stick up for him because he did say he was sorry, helped me pick up all the nuts out of the drawer and the utensil caddy, and bought me a new can of nuts. I couldn't eat them after they fell all over those utensils; gross! To my credit, I did make absolutely sure there were no nuts left in the drawer. And they were unsalted, so Jennifer's assertion that I should have washed all those utensils is totally unreasonable. There must be 30 forks in there, and at least that many knives and spoons. They were still clean enough to use. Besides, wouldn't Aaron have to wash them?

I have to say, for the record, that maybe people with allergies should be extra careful using utensils from the community drawer. I know this girl who can't eat wheat gluten, and she has to wash everything before using it, even at her own house. That seems like the safest approach to me. I know what you're dealing with, too, so I know it's not easy. I had these friends in grade school who had Persian cats, and they didn't care if the cats went all over their counter tops and in their cupboards. I mean those cats went everywhere, and so was the fur. So when I was at their house, I had to inspect every dish extremely well before I could use it. I usually found a few cat hairs, which meant I had to wash the dish. What a pain! But, you know, sometimes that level of vigilance is worth it.

I'm sure you know more about this whole thing than I do, so I'll let you figure out the best solution. I'll do my best to make sure to let you know if anything like this ever happens again. Please don't be too mad at Aaron. Hope to see you soon. Take care.